Have You Ever Met Someone You Can’t Fucking Stand?

I’m sure the answer to the above question is yes….

Don't pretend you never hate people or you're an arsehole too!

Don’t pretend you never hate people or you’re an arsehole too!

Everyone has met someone who they just don’t get along with. It’s a basic fact of life that some people are just fucking unbearable to be around! Well, here I’m going to describe the “personality” of an actual person that I not only have met, but I’ve also had the misfortune of enduring the “company” of from time to time in a workplace environment. Ah Jeez, God give me the strength…. Here we go (rant mode):

OK, well this person is the sort of person that if you meet him in a passing casual manner, then you’ll probably come away with the impression that he’s a pretty friendly jovial character. There’s always a smile and a bit of light-hearted small-talk style banter. No worries, I can deal with that since I’m a friendly person myself (most of the time). Anyway, this scenario of thinking the person’s alright can go on for a few meetings/days, provided the meetings/days are intermittent, that way you don’t have to put up with a big dose of the “personality”. That’s how it was when I first knew this person, so I was really none the wiser. Then as of about 8 months ago I began working with him a bit more regularly and this is when his most irritating characteristics began to surface. (nearly puked in my beer just thinking about it – oh well)

So, what are those irritating characteristics which make him the biggest wanker I’ve ever met?

First up is verbal diarrhea – Anyone who just talks all the fucking time like there’s actually some obligation to do so is fucking annoying. Verbal diarrhea is always a good indication of someone who loves attention and needs to be accepted and loved by everyone, although they’d be the last person to admit it, which brings me to the second characteristic:

Extreme vanity and self-love – I’ve never met anyone with a bigger love for themselves than this person. He always has a fucking smug little smile which says “if I were any better than I am, then the world would explode.” No-one knows how we would ever have a riveting conversation if it weren’t for this dickheads antidotes! Anyway, extreme talking and vanity are two key characteristics and both are fucking sickening.

Third is making the tasks of the workplace, which are remarkably simple, into difficult operations – Apart from doing the physical aspect of my work, there is nothing hard to understand about any of it. It’s just a case of “here’s the job”, now “fucking do it!” The following sums it up nicely:

Q. So why do some people always have to complicate everything? 

A. It’s because, no matter what, they always have to be the controlling sort of personality. If something is easy and requires no oversight, then they feel left out and unimportant, like this pathetic useless fucking weasel is. He never does any actual work, except in his voice-box department telling whoever already knows what to do, how to do it in a slightly different way, which is always stupider than before. Then, if you don’t agree to do it his way, he will get upset and enter “insecurity mode“. “Insecurity mode” is where he starts talking about how much experience he has doing this intellectually simple task, and that is why you should be doing it his way. What a dickhead.

And fourth is Height – a vertically challenged person; not that there aren’t good short people out there, but this issue is relevant in this case and might help explain the need for him to enter “insecurity mode” whenever anyone suggests their own idea of how to do the job. My brother refers to this as “little man syndrome” – a rather apt analogy, don’t you think?

More about this midget pile of puke:

Just to add to how much I hate this person – I am now going to describe a typical lunchtime or smoko break with him involved. This is what he talks about:

Depending on who we are working with the topic might vary, but it always comes back to some fucking TV show, maybe a brilliant doco, or what so and so’s wife is up to on Facebook (Jewbook). If it’s not that it’s his usual back-stabbing two-faced attitude that he seems to have against everyone, except for his special “yes men” sorts. Prying into another mans sex-life is also part of the game, as sickening as that is. Basically, he’s either in “whinging whining bitch mode” about everyone who’s not there on that particular day, or it’s “I’m so good, I’m so great, look at me, I’m a fucking midget” mode! The two-facedness knows no bounds with this shithead.

TV - where bullshit is manufactured, because we don't make anything else in this country anymore!

TV – where bullshit is manufactured, because we don’t make anything else in this country anymore!

What might also come up at break-time are his ever-enlightening political views, which I’ll list off for simplicity’s sake:

Likes –

  • Nelson Mandela and his family of A.N.C. commie criminals.
  • The modern state of Israeli criminals.
  • Discussing (provided you don’t disagree with the Jews) feelings of both sides in the Israeli/Palestinian conflict. It’s all about feelings folks – not Jews killing everyone else apparently – according to an Israeli documentary…
  • Some of his best friends are Jewish. Says it all really.
  • Bludging (lazy fuck), whilst endlessly emphasizing how important his role is to the crew, therefore communism  the life-blood of the useless parasite! Some are more equal than others it would seem.
  • Materialism – It’s always about possessions. They matter so much to every selfish fuckhead. Houses, pools, cars, money, and there you go! This time it’s capitalism he loves! Funny how capitalism and communism are two sides of the same Jewish coin.

DIslikes –

  • Any opinion not on the TV.
  • Racism, because the TV said so.
  • Anyone else being able to think for themselves – I.e. how to do their job. Loves communism, once again.
  • Anyone who doesn’t view him as an “Emmanuel Goldstein” type figure (1984 – George Orwell) despite the fact that he is not the boss!

I could list a million more things that piss me off about this fucking idiot, but I’m at the end of my tether right now, so I’m not going to bother. Either way, I felt like writing this for some reason, venting my anger mainly, and now I feel better, so that means it was worth it!

Just remember the key lesson – idiots and arrogant arseholes are a plenty and somehow we have to deal with them. I’m sure everyone knows someone who roughly fits this description and if they happen to be in your workplace, try not to punch their head in, because that will only fuck your job/job opportunities up, unless you don’t care about keeping your job, then you can do as you please!

Finally, I haven’t actually punched this person in the head, even though I’d love to – I’ve kept my cool under extraordinarily irritating circumstances and I’m promoting “keeping ones cool” because it ain’t worth the trouble. After all – you’ll never turn an arsehole into something good!

– BDL1983

9 thoughts on “Have You Ever Met Someone You Can’t Fucking Stand?

  1. Steven King

    Hey Brett

    I know someone JUST LIKE THIS. It’s uncanny! You can’t get in a word edgewise! Really great post man. Shit it sounded like me describing the same person. Good for you man. Don’t put up with it. And don’t put up with Faceberg either!

    Steven

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Reply
  2. Steve

    Brett,
    Sounds like this weasel is a bit confused with his identity, tell him to fuck off and that mothers group is at Gloria Jeans daily at 10:00 sharp, he will fit in there better.

    Steve

    Reply
    1. BDL1983 Post author

      OK, then it’s a match made in heaven for this character: Gloria Jeans 10:00 Sharp! If he doesn’t like that then I’m a Dutchman! Hahahha

      Reply
  3. DP

    Lol that post was good. I also work with someone similar, and some days I think my head will explode from the bombardment of bullshit.

    Reply
  4. G

    Waaaaaa 😅😂😂 I am relieved. Thought I was going slightly mad – as Freddie Mercury so eloquently puts it “it finally happened”…

    Reply

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